fairytale/

Fairytale, really?
but it was never meant to be a fairytale. life's not perfect, life has its ups and its downs. what we have is more than a perfect story. we have a lifestory.

in life there's sure to be sorrow and disappointments. but its the darkness that makes the moon and stars shine brighter. and we know that through it all, we can trust that God's there for us. lighting up our life paths even at its darkest hours. bringing us unfathomable joy.
because He himself is Hope.

so here, trachelizo (v):
Laid bare and exposed.
each chapter, each episode recording genuine feelings and thoughts as a Child of God goes through the rollercoaster of life. and how the Grace of God still leaves her amazed and humbled, each time.

soaking prayer worship music

Tuesday, March 16,9:49 PM

God is gracious. God is amazing. God is my Father.

SERIOUSLY, i just HAD to start with that. hahaha.

last night i realised the full extent of His providence and concern for me.

if it happened at any other time before sunday, i think i wouldve errrr. died or sth. LOL k no la.

anyway, the word was Beloved. this word struck me remember? (refer. yes) never would i have known that this week would be one that i'll need that affirmation. and reassurance.

i mean yeah its sad. but well, i dont know. i'll miss you.

but well just that He was just gracious enough, to find a way out for me.

No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man, God is faithful and will not let you be tempted beyond your strength but with the temptation provide a way of escape that you may be able to endure it. 1cor10:13

as in, its not that i didnt have to follow what He commanded me to do, not really 'a way out' but rather, making it easier for me to follow.

it was kinda like a break for me, feel rather free now. never realised that this was the cause of errr, nvm. :D hiiiiiii. okay as in, not that i'm happy. just that, well. i shouldnt have held on to false hope, see. self-deception in a way.

in any case, i feel really peaceful and joyful.

heyyyyyyyy. alright, i really think sir paul tan is awesome!! he's really super nice la and i dont know. just felt really bad disappointing him, especially when i knew i couldve done better. i was just super confused and blanking out. i really need to pray about this. shouldnt let all these emotions and pressures overwhelm me. if real ioc then how.

this song has been playing in my head today:
Along the road of life (ib is my life)
I have a friend divine :D
who walks with me
and gently leads the way
He gives me joy
and makes the darkest night to shine. (Amen)
It is my Lord who won my heart one day. (its yours, take it.)

I do not mind
the rough and winding pathway
o'er mountain steep
through valley dark and cold
It is enough to know He travels by my side
along the road that leads to streets of gold. (well, maybe gold not so important. more importantly to be with the One who truly loves me)

(:

anyway read this off from http://c-elebration.livejournal.com/39436.html

"I just had to write and tell you how much I love and care for you.
yesterday, I saw you walking and laughing with your friends; I hoped that soon you'd want Me to walk along with you, too. so I painted you a sunset to close your day and whispered a cool breeze to refresh you. I waited - you never called - I just kept on loving you.

as I watched you fall asleep last night, I wanted so much to touch you. I spilled moonlight onto your face- trickling down your cheeks as so many tears have. you didn't even think of Me; I wanted so much to comfort you.

the next day I exploded a brilliant sunrise into glorious morning for you. but you woke up late and rushed off to work- you didn't even notice My sky became cloudy and My tears were in the rain.

I love you. oh, if you'd only listen. I really love you. I try to say it in the quiet of the green meadow and in the blue sky. the wind whispers My love throughout the tree tops and spills it into vibrant colours or all the flowers. I shout it to you in the thunder of the great waterfalls and compose love songs for the birds to sing for you. I warm you with the clothing of My sunshine and perfume the air with nature's sweet scent. My love for you is deeper than any ocean and greater than any need in your heart. if you'd only realise how I care.

My Dad sends His love. I want you to meet Him- He cares, too. fathers are just that way. so, please call on Me soon.

no matter how long it takes, I'll wait-

because I love you.
your Friend,
Jesus

seriously, wow.