fairytale/

Fairytale, really?
but it was never meant to be a fairytale. life's not perfect, life has its ups and its downs. what we have is more than a perfect story. we have a lifestory.

in life there's sure to be sorrow and disappointments. but its the darkness that makes the moon and stars shine brighter. and we know that through it all, we can trust that God's there for us. lighting up our life paths even at its darkest hours. bringing us unfathomable joy.
because He himself is Hope.

so here, trachelizo (v):
Laid bare and exposed.
each chapter, each episode recording genuine feelings and thoughts as a Child of God goes through the rollercoaster of life. and how the Grace of God still leaves her amazed and humbled, each time.

soaking prayer worship music

Friday, January 9,9:30 PM

argh, so long never update alr. anyway, who reads right? lol

i've been spending my holidays rather wastefully. the only useful thing i did was to go PC show lah. walao. go for so many interviews, try so many times only to get more disappointment.

i keep thinking hoping, even for a little thing but yet. so damn sian. :/

shit. shit. janice, get yourself out of this.

anyway, on a lighter note, i guess i should be real thankful to my mum. my maid left so she has been helping out in the house real hard. but, age is taking its hold. her hands are really painful now. so i'll just have to help her. i have learnt many things, ironing, vacuuming, cleaning, washing, everything. i've found that ironing is quite therapeutic. gives me satisfaction when i succesfully ironed the shirts and pants(: lol.

and i wanted to plan class BBQ or at least an outing. but people said they're bored of BBQ so wanted a party. but no one wants to plan and everyone's busy and stuff. once we get results, some may not feel like going for outing. sigh, i dont know why. but i just feel disappointed sometimes. everyone is so darn busy. :/ anyway, i dont expect a class party anyhow. not sure if people wants BBQ but so far, no one even responded to anything. grah.

shit lah. dont know why i feel so low. :/ i need people to play badminton with me man. shit shit shit. i miss the times we spent.

anw, few days ago was the highlight of my holiday. i went to east coast with CL exco (pw, zoey, aonan and yanjie) quite fun with all the screaming during rollerblading and everything. actually i feel like going blading by myself man. not sure why. lol. okay, and aonan said a happy thing! 'i'm growing up and that i'm getting normal now! HAHAH(: like, totally man. and i'm almost aonan's height! hahaha.

i need some ego boost man. i feel so abandoned lah. no friends, no school, no cca, no job. SHIT man.

anw, we also went bowling! and dumb me dropped a bowling ball on my toe, like i think i severed a few nerves cos my toe is really numb. lol. and i kinda hurt my arm and back bowling like WTH. HAHAH. but i still got the best score. hahha, but the rest did well too(: i really missed them LOADS(: haha. reminded me of the time we played bowling part of the class.... HEH. so fun.

i miss everything. i miss school. i miss hanging out in the class making kacang puteh for RHD. i miss taking pictures when we dressed up as a soccer class, i miss going to hans to study biology, i miss buying chilli mayo fries from the market there, i miss physics remedial when we laugh at mr goh and silly classmates like fiona's 'underwear leh?' hahah. i miss all our funny jokes man. i miss everything. i miss canteen. i miss iodine drink. i miss ba chor mee. LOL.

i miss my lower sec. i miss staying back in school just to clean whiteboard with wet tissue. i miss going for 'tuition' at pp mac with family and ms png. i miss taking neoprint every week. i miss laughing at alyssa lee for her slow pace. i miss laughing at pw silly jokes. i miss going to zoey's house to make burnt cookies. i miss singing with suet far and yvonne's sweet wonderful voices.

i miss going to seremban. i miss playing in the train. i miss eating cup noodles. i miss eating muruku from the mama store just before youth. i miss playing with alexis, ryan they all at creche. i miss everything man.

well, now. we're all terribly grown up and everything. JC will never be like cedar life. no crazy people doing weird stuff. my future is waiting for me at the MOE HQ now and will be shown to me on mon, 2pm. :/